Powerball Dreaming: What To Do If Sudden Wealth Comes Calling

Can you feel the slight frenzy in the air? 1.4 billion dollars are up for the winning this week in the Powerball lottery. Do you have your ticket yet? I have mine! Of course I do--because even though I have better odds of being elected president than winning, there is a chance. And you can’t win if you don’t play.

As a sudden wealth coach who works with people dealing with the emotional and logistical fallout of financial windfalls, what is my plan if my numbers are pulled this week? 

It is the same as the advice I give to my clients who come into $20,000, $20 million or $200 million from a lawsuit, divorce, retirement payout, dream job, business sale or inheritance.  And those windfalls happen all the time.

1—Pause and Assess

            Don’t rush into anything. Most financial windfalls are the result of a big change.  Any loss or change of routine comes with disorientation and various stages of grief and overwhelm.  The emotions can range from relief, to lack of deserving, to anxiety about the added responsibilities.

            With these changes also comes a redefining of identity—from married to divorced, or widowed, from the guy in charge to retiree, from the co-worker to the boss, or from part of cast to the star.  It takes time to accommodate this new role and figure out the new rules and responsibilities.

            Stepping back from Doing, allows you to start the process of figuring out what is important now and who you want to be in the midst of all this change.

2—Make a Plan.

            Take time to create a plan.  For some people, 3-4 months extra salary at once can be over-whelming and be gone faster than it came. Even if this is “play money” for you, make a plan of how you want to spend it, share it, pay-it-forward and/or save it. 

           

            Even if the amount seems bigger than you could ever spend in a lifetime, trust me, there will be plenty of people and opportunities to prove you wrong.  

            Creating a solid plan helps you focus on what is important to you, establish good boundaries, and gives you structure when there are way too many options.

2—Build Your Team

            Hire a team of professionals you like and respect to help you protect your assets and limit your liabilities. Typical team members include: a financial planner (CFP, wealth manager, etc.), a tax attorney, CPA, insurance professional, estate attorney.  And, yes, a certified coach as a sounding board, perspective shifter and accountability partner.

            There may be others you want for your circumstances, but what is important is that you feel heard and that you are comfortable with your team.  If you don’t understand a concept—ask questions. If you are still confused, ask more questions.  If you do not get clarity, get a new team member.

            You do not need to be an expert, but you do need to understand how your money is being invested and why.

3—“No” is your Friend

            There will be many people who will want to help you spend and invest your new found fortune.  Family, friends and strangers will approach you with opportunities and tales of woe.  Stick to your plan.  You are not responsible for everyone.  If you want to share, work with your team to create a plan to make that happen.

            If someone or some project is not part of your plan, you can gently tell them no or not at this time.  You can even “blame” your lawyers or advisers for not being able to help at this time.  Remember, every No is a Yes to something else.

4—Self-Care

            It is okay to treat yourself well when you have a windfall.  Eat well, get plenty of sleep, exercise, and take time for reflection—through meditation or journaling.  You will change and grow as you adjust to your new circumstances and you want to be able to follow your instincts. 

           

            What have you always wanted to do, but have been putting it off? What toy or treasure have you always wanted, but have denied yourself?  Life isn’t about the stuff AND living by a code of self-denial isn’t a virtue. 

Financial windfalls are much more common that the Powerball hitting $1Billion.  Having a plan and the support to put it into place can help reduce the stress and make it a time of opportunity rather than a minefield of overwhelm.

Money--What is the Big Secret?

When you hear the words “money” and “secret” in the same sentence, you might assume I’m gonna be talking about the Law of Attraction and how to attain wealth with your thoughts and intention. But not so much.  What interests me more is that money is such an uncomfortable topic.  I have rarely found a group of people just hanging out and talking about their relationship with money if they weren’t financial professionals or at a money workshop. 

When was the last time you hung out with your friends and discussed what you earn, what you save, and what your fears or insights are about money?  Never would be my response, but we talk about almost everything else—death, drugs, sex, politics, children’s literature. What is the big taboo about money?

For me, I feel that money is so wrapped up with self-esteem and my view of being worthy and valuable, that I risk being exposed as Not Enough if I spoke about my income and lack of financial savvy.  And this is regardless of my income and level of financial savvy—because I might be the wealthiest and smartest one in the room, but we will never know. And what if we did know—what might change in our relationships?  Hmmm….

As a new entrepreneur, try to have a discussion about setting fees and what peers charge and how that is working for them.  I live in a city with millions of potential clients and maybe ten thousand coaches at the high end.  There is no lack of opportunity for abundance for everyone, but it is the rare entrepreneur that speaks openly about how they are doing financially, what fees work, and what their concerns are.  What would happen if we could just say, “I charge this much an hour, some clients don’t blink, others run screaming”. Why is there an assumption that we should all have this money thing figured out? And when we find that one shining star that has found the key for them, we make their way THE RIGHT way?

And what, really, does my financial worth say about my value as a friend, spouse, business professional or member of society?  Is Bill Gates a better human being, father, husband because he has loads of cash? Are any of the Kardashians, who are famous and wealthy because they are famous and wealthy, people that you want your children to use as role models?  And we know Oprah is still working on her stuff—in great looking homes and locations—but is it about the money?  I know most of us want to find out. 

I want peace of mind, excellent health, a passionate partner, true friends, a creative/prosperous career and a wonderful home. 

How do I separate the almighty dollar from my definition of self-worth? I think it may be about creating a definition of what I want money to mean for me.  Money is an instrument of possibility and opportunity.  

This definition creates some detachment for me from the allure that money means more or reflects on me in any way. More money can mean more possibility and opportunity; less money may mean I need to be more creative, more conscientious, and more intentional with it.  Simple—not easy.

My goal is to take the shame and taboo out of the money conversation. We all have it and need it to some extent. We all use it daily. We tend to feel that either there is never enough, or that we personally don’t have enough—no matter how much we have. So, why the big secret???

______________________________

Carol Dacey-Charles, ACC, CPCC    

I am an ICF-accredited life, leadership and sudden wealth coach. I partner with my clients to find balance, clarity and peace of mind on their way to creating the lives they have always wanted. There are no extra points for suffering--Why Not Thrive?

Contact me for a complimentary 30-minute sample session, carol@ynoththrive.com